holy sh*t it's ✨MJC-mail✨!

Hello you beautiful bunch, thank you for choosing to open this newsletter and be here with me on the first Saturday of the month for our cosy catch-up! I’m grateful that out of all the places on the internet, you’ve chosen to show up here. I think that’s pretty special. 🥰

If you’re new, welcome!! This is where I share my thoughts, feels, and things I’ve been up to once-a-month, away from the noise of regular social media platforms and their algorithms. I come straight to your inbox, baby!

I love it when this space feels like a familiar catch-up with an old friend, so if you want to: get comfortable, pour something warm, and tell me about your stuff in the comments as well!

Extra special thank yous to my paid subscribers here, I’ve created a lot of free content over the years and you choosing to buy me a coffee once a month is a lovely way to say that you see the value in all that. I appreciate you 🤗

November, you’ve been cold af, but we found some warm moments, didn’t we?

I started the month with a trip up North to visit my girlfriend’s family for Bonfire night (US readers, that’s a celebration where we set off a bunch of fireworks bc once-upon-a-time some dude tried to burn down Parliament).

Nature walks, writing my name with a sparkler & doggo snuggles = perfect weekend.

Things with bae have been extra beautiful lately 💜 When I describe her to friends I usually say “she’s exactly the kind of person I’ve spent my life imagining I would be with one day” - in earlier years I didn’t imagine that that person would be a woman, but hey, I grew up in a heteronormative world where I was taught that happily ever after only happens when a man is present. I’m really glad to have unlearned that and opened my heart up to this kind of love. She is the most wonderful.

Also, we look fuckin’ great together.

Not that it’s appearances that matter… but we sure do know how to turn a lewk. Left: on the red carpet of The Crown season 5. Right: at the Gay Times Honours.

And let’s not forget about that platonic love! This month I got to celebrate my best friend’s 30th birthday (somewhat of a surprise to both of us considering she lives as if she’s got 9 lives).

We played mini-golf, had a bottomless brunch, did some v chaotic karaoke, and ended up in an empty nightclub at 1am on a Monday morning. Oh, and everyone was dressed up as Joeley (Joeley was dressed as her most iconic self):

The daytime Joeley uniform (crocs + socks, trackies, bucket hat, sunglasses) Vs the night time Joeley uniform)

I was EXTRA proud of my all-day party stamina, partly because it just don’t come natural anymore 😭😭 but mainly because I was knocked OUT the entire week before with the flu:

damn you feeble human immune system

But with a bit of rest and a lot of cold & flu remedies, we were back up and at ‘em! Of course I had to head back home and get some time in with my sister, the Queen of Everything. 👑

Sunshine, family, McDonalds.

It’s not always smiles and rainbows being a carer (actually, it’s been some of the hardest work I’ve ever done at times), but I wouldn’t trade it for all the shiny events in the world. This one always keeps me grounded and reminds me that enjoying yourself is kind of the whole point of being here.

Speaking of, this week I’ve been frantically pulling together the pieces to throw another Christmas party for Gemma and her friends at the local disabled community centre they all go to! It was probably my favourite day of last year and I’m really excited to go party with the cool kids again!

Last year Linda Blacker took beautiful portraits, we made gingerbread houses, had a buffet, makeovers & karaoke! It’s gonna be a hard one to top…

I’ve had a couple of little brain wobbles this month (getting ill always makes you vulnerable to those, doesn’t it?), but I’m mainly good, feeling very grateful, and getting ready to turn my brain off a bit more over Christmas!

How are you? What’s new in your world? Fill me in!

Something that’s been on my mind lately…

Is it ok to not look for the bad in everything?

My brain has a habit of leaning towards what could go wrong more than what could go right. If someone shows me a beautiful thing, I immediately wonder about the ugliness that probably went into creating it. I’m constantly weighing up the ethics of everything and I’m always aware of how much harm exists in the world.

And that… is a drag.

Some of it is a safety mechanism (be hyper-aware of all the things so that you’re prepared). Some of it is internet conditioning (there’s always a new problematic thing to point out and shout about for likes). And some of it is just… wanting to be a decent human. Which I wouldn’t want to get rid of. But also, looking towards the bad every time is no way to live.

We’re existing in a time where everything we do is more morally twisted up than it’s ever been. But we still have to do the living. We still have to find joy, and make memories, and give ourselves a fucking break sometimes so that we feel able to keep going.

So yes, it’s good that you’re aware and that you want things to be better. But no, you don’t have to look for the bad in every single thing, every single time. You can give yourself permission to look towards the good. The other stuff will be there to figure out once you’ve refilled your cup and restored the balance a little.

Transcript: Hello my loves, this is just a short one today. I would like to remind you that some people walk into high position jobs purely because their family owns the company and they never feel imposter syndrome. Some people have millions of followers on social media because they cut up soap and they never doubt whether their content has value. And some people are born billionaires and they never think about whether they deserve that. And you? You who has worked this hard and overcome this much to get to where you are? You still doubt whether you deserve the things you have? Let’s just let that sink in for a second. If you do one thing today, give yourself some motherfucking credit for everything you have done to get to where you are. That’s all!

Alright my loves, thank you for spending this time with me and I’ll see you real soon! The comment section is always open and don’t forget you can go to the webpage version of this newsletter to catch up with past posts & download other One Minute Reminders anytime.

Take care & stay warm!!

Love,

M

💜