19 Comments

The internet can be a wonderful place but it can also be super sucky! I'm working on my doctorate in educational leadership and my focus is digital citizenship or teaching kids how to use the internet without being assholes. We are all building this ship while we are sailing it but hopefully through thoughtful lessons on the power and responsibility of online life we can prepare future generations for more.

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Heather this is fascinating! Can I ask whether there's any specific literature you use in teaching this? Would love any recommendations 🥰 thanks for being here and sharing this! 💜

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The two K-12 curriculums I am most familiar with are from Common Sense Media and Google. The Common Sense Media curriculum has lessons for every grade level from littles through high school. For Google they are mostly focused on upper primary and middle school. Ther are others available but these two are FREE and provide lots of extra resources for teachers and families! https://www.commonsense.org/education/digital-citizenship

https://beinternetawesome.withgoogle.com/en_us/interland

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Here is the UK version of the Common Sense Curriculum - https://www.commonsense.org/education/uk/digital-citizenship

Here is the UK version of the Google Site - https://beinternetawesome.withgoogle.com/en_uk/interland

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Thanks for much Heather!! 💜

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I lived without social media until I was about 40, no internet, no google... email was new and exciting to me! And here I am now, 13 years on and spending much more time on this gadget than is helpful or nourishing to me. I’m determined to change, but then find myself ‘needing’ to check something. I guess I never was any good at denial. What I am good at is doing more of something. And for me the perfect antidote to screen is feet on grass, so I’m determined to do more of that. Today, the grass is warm and moist - downright sexy 😘

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I wanna hear more about this perspective of going totally from one to the other! So looking forward to sharing some sexy grass w u soon! 💜

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A lot of my family and Facebook friends are more right leaning, or don't take the time to educate themselves on issues before they post or share things. Whenever something big breaks and its over socials, I'll post my view if I feel like sharing it. I don't mind healthy debate and actually enjoy it at times, but I can end up feeling exhausted when people argue against me passionately but can't tell me WHY they feel the opposite, or what their opinion is based on.

Away from contentious topics, social media is a lifeline for me. I have very few friends that I see regularly in real life, and being a single parent gets lonely. So scrolling through insta or Facebook makes me feel connected to other people. I could probably do with putting my phone down more regularly though x

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Raych you have more energy left for this than I do! One thing that really opened my eyes this year was understanding the extent of how social media feeds are totally personalised to the individual. And in terms of arguing with people who have different opinions to you (and you don't understand how they just don't "get" it - most of the time they literally haven't seen it. They've been existing in their own social media reality that's confirming all their biases and building up their own echo chambers, so pulling people out of that to see a new perspective is like trying to undo years of constant conditioning in one comment section. And that's hard fucking work.

Totally see and appreciate the other side of this as well. I definitely find myself more inclined to reach for my phone when I'm doing a shift taking care of Gemma. 💜

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Definitely not just you. Been feeling this way a lot this year and have felt others shift too. Looking forward to more instalments and conversations about dildos 🤣🍆

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Not just you.

I think as we have been trapped in our homes and living a lot of our lives online this year we have all achieved a saturation level that is unhealthy and probably all need to take time off. Well done you for managing it, I can’t imagine it was easy!

I am not a content creator, my IG account is private, I follow a few friends who post pictures of their lives without social or political comment and I follow some content creators who share “political” content. (And some who just post pretty pictures of their house to feed my property porn addiction). Because I don’t know these people I have no problem unfollowing them if they post content that I find problematic. I am a good unfollower, I have never informed some one that they have “lost me” 😂.

Facebook on the other hand is full of people I know in real life and while some of these - old work colleagues, school friends I haven’t seen in decades - get sharply unfriended when they post highly dubious content; some of them are actual friends and family; and while I would love to cancel my mother in law (god I wish!) the familial strife just isn’t worth it!

So I have had to learn in that space to pick my battles, to ignore some things, to only confront the indefensible. To scroll past and shrug.

This year has not been easy for me, I have really struggled at times, getting angry over everything on the Internet is something I simply can’t do any more for my own mental well-being.

Will still happily argue with anyone who works in the nhs and votes Tory though.

And we ALL need more baby animals on our feed.

Xx

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Lucy I appreciate this comment SO much. Thank you for sharing. Definitely cheering you on in continuing to find this balance and also in dealing with your mother in law 🙃💜

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This is something I've gone over and over again this year. I'm wrapping up a masters degree which has been 90% online where I've only been able to talk to my classmates via social media, I get paid for doing company social media, and I'm working on a whole load of things that I really care about that "need" to be advertised and promoted *on social media* and... ugh. Between that and then only being able to stay in touch with family and friends via social media this last year, it's a vicious conflict between knowing that I'm better off spending less time scrolling but feeling obliged to keep posting and engaging and posting and engaging... In a weird way I'm glad that this year's made my social media use so visible for me, because I've started to really reconsider my priorities! I love the flexibility of working remotely, but it's so draining for me to be posting at all hours so I'm looking at more in-person jobs. Writing and education is so important for me, but I get the most joy from community and working with people, so I'm trying to find ways to take that offline and make what I do more engaged and more meaningful than posting about it. It sometimes feels like a pointless attempt to disengage (or maybe re-engage in a different way) when absolutely everything is online but I think it's better to at least have some awareness? I think? I don't know, but I do know you're not alone in wrestling with this!!

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This is a topic that I've been thinking (and worrying) about a lot. I've noticed in myself that I'm constantly reaching for my phone; that my focus is utter shit unless it's in a different room; that my ability to put sentences together when talking feels like I've reverted to some bumbley, preteen version of myself. And to be frank, it scares me. I'm trying to leave my phone in different rooms or to just turn the damn thing off, but it's so hard. Are any of you struggling with this? How are you managing it? Has anything helped you kick the addiction?

PS- thank you Megan for starting this little space❤️ I'm in love with it already

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Big time feeling this Gracie and appreciate you for sharing!! I think for me, the only way I can ever break a habit that's baaaad for me is by learning the depths of how bad it is so that I can truly tap into "fuck this shit I'm out" energy. I *really* hate it when billionaire white dudes are profiting from my mental distress so learning more about how social media intentionally keeps us addicted for profit was a big kick for me (did you watch The Social Dilemma?).

I saw a post last week that basically said when you reach for your phone try asking yourself what need you're really trying to fill and how else you might fill it. A lot of the time for me it's connection to other humans, and a short phone call is probably more likely to give me that than 2 hours of scrolling. 💜

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Social media is such a fantastic outlet for raising awareness and connecting us with people but it also has so many negatives.

Katy Perry once said “I just wanna throw my phone away, find out who is really there for me” and I feel like that’s what a lot of us did this past year!

It was like we were Sims on triple speed and lockdown gave us the chance to slow back down to normal again 💜!

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Omg a Sims reference YES. 💜

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Jul 3, 2021
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I think I only have one friend who doesn't do social media at all and she always seems super content with life. And I've definitely had moments over the last year of feeling the same way as you! One thing I've been hyper-aware of lately is the sheer amount of information we take in with every scroll, and how as little as 200 years ago most people didn't have a clue what was even going on outside of their town. We're genuinely not evolved for this shit, and I think that's really gonna start to show up in the mental health of the first generation big-time users (us). 💜

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I think about reverting to a basic phone too!! Do they even make them anymore... Then I also get inside my head about whether I NEED a smartphone to exist in today's world

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