One afternoon during the summer, my dad asked me if I wanted to walk down to the beach. Over the years, whenever my brain has been playing tricks on me, a long walk and an honest talk has always helped pull me back to reality. We strolled towards the water and sat on the concrete steps leading down to the sand. I watched strangers splashing in waves, playing games with plastic seaside toys, sunbathing and laughing at jokes I couldn’t hear. I felt a million miles away from them.
Michele that quote is brilliant!! Thank you for sharing! And you're right, the every day moments of joy are everywhere if you let them in 💜 I hope you get your own version of the beach as well!! ☀️
Megan Jayne ❤, Heather Jayne here!!! I read your book several years ago in the throes of anorexia, and emerging from that (slowly but surely) has shown me that my eating disorder self truly believes that I don't deserve anything. Joy? Bah!!! Joy is our little slice of heaven here on this wondrous, crazy planet and it now deeply saddens me to know that I denied myself joy, as you did, for so long. Sending you so much love, and appreciation. Joy is a gift that, lest we allow it for ourselves, it spreads like wildfire. May you have it, in abundance!!!! Xxx
Heather Jayne you absolutely shining star thank you!! For being here, reading my book, committing to recovery and yourself and joy! I loved reading this and I'm wishing you endless amounts more of this freedom 💜💜
I worry about this sometimes. Not so much specifically "Joy" but hope too. I've always been the most optimistic person, people affectionately referred to me as "irritatingly chirpy". But I've been alone for nearly 7 years raising two girls with just a couple of friends I rarely see (obviously still appreciate them hugely) and the longer it went on, the more effort it took to stay hopeful and happy and find the joy, and eventually I ran out of energy. For a while now I've been entirely devoid of hope that things will change or get better, I just feel like this is my life and how things will always be, and it's a crappy mindset but I can't shift it. I worry that not having the energy to hope for better things or feel joy, might be actively pushing better things away because I'm putting out a negative vibe or not getting out there looking for them. It's hard. I'm so glad you're embracing the joy though, your little corner of the Internet is such a haven of sunshine and laughter, and your relationship with Gemma is beautiful, it really makes me smile ❤
Raych, forgive me if this crosses the line of armchair psychology, but it sounds like not being able to access hope right now has just become another thing you're beating yourself up for when it's actually a very understandable response to your environment?? You are carrying so much. You do so much. You deserve to be held and supported and I don't think how you feel is a case of you putting out the wrong vibe. What you're doing is hard. It won't always feel the same, but it's okay to be real about how it feels now. 💜💜
Pandemic parenting is HARD, please give yourself some credit for making it and be kind to yourself! Sending you love and hugs and wishing you joy, you deserve it!
Your weekly emails always contain amazing snip its of information, opportunities to learn new things, allowing myself to feel like we’re not alone. You are such a beam of light, thank you for what you do! ❤️✨
I *definitely* needed to hear this, and I am sharing this with friends and colleagues who are also struggling. Joy is so important to give AND receive, and we need to give it to ourselves as well…even if we (incorrectly) think we don’t deserve it. Thank you for your uplifting messages 💜
It's awful how hard we can be on ourselves. And allowing the "broken" world to crush our souls.
Your statement brought me back to a time when I felt the same way:
"Feeling like a piece of shit every day just seemed to make sense!"
As I've gotten older I am finding joy in things that used to seem so insignificant. Finding joy in every day little things is such a .... JOY :)
Here's one (of many) quotes/reminders I keep around me:
“We either make ourselves miserable, or we make ourselves strong. The amount of work is the same.” Carlos Castaneda
Looking forward to seeing pictures of you this summer Megan, being the person on the beach playing, laughing, letting in the sunshine! XO
Michele that quote is brilliant!! Thank you for sharing! And you're right, the every day moments of joy are everywhere if you let them in 💜 I hope you get your own version of the beach as well!! ☀️
Thanks for another insightful and timely piece. This is so important ❤️
Megan Jayne ❤, Heather Jayne here!!! I read your book several years ago in the throes of anorexia, and emerging from that (slowly but surely) has shown me that my eating disorder self truly believes that I don't deserve anything. Joy? Bah!!! Joy is our little slice of heaven here on this wondrous, crazy planet and it now deeply saddens me to know that I denied myself joy, as you did, for so long. Sending you so much love, and appreciation. Joy is a gift that, lest we allow it for ourselves, it spreads like wildfire. May you have it, in abundance!!!! Xxx
Heather Jayne you absolutely shining star thank you!! For being here, reading my book, committing to recovery and yourself and joy! I loved reading this and I'm wishing you endless amounts more of this freedom 💜💜
I worry about this sometimes. Not so much specifically "Joy" but hope too. I've always been the most optimistic person, people affectionately referred to me as "irritatingly chirpy". But I've been alone for nearly 7 years raising two girls with just a couple of friends I rarely see (obviously still appreciate them hugely) and the longer it went on, the more effort it took to stay hopeful and happy and find the joy, and eventually I ran out of energy. For a while now I've been entirely devoid of hope that things will change or get better, I just feel like this is my life and how things will always be, and it's a crappy mindset but I can't shift it. I worry that not having the energy to hope for better things or feel joy, might be actively pushing better things away because I'm putting out a negative vibe or not getting out there looking for them. It's hard. I'm so glad you're embracing the joy though, your little corner of the Internet is such a haven of sunshine and laughter, and your relationship with Gemma is beautiful, it really makes me smile ❤
Raych, forgive me if this crosses the line of armchair psychology, but it sounds like not being able to access hope right now has just become another thing you're beating yourself up for when it's actually a very understandable response to your environment?? You are carrying so much. You do so much. You deserve to be held and supported and I don't think how you feel is a case of you putting out the wrong vibe. What you're doing is hard. It won't always feel the same, but it's okay to be real about how it feels now. 💜💜
Pandemic parenting is HARD, please give yourself some credit for making it and be kind to yourself! Sending you love and hugs and wishing you joy, you deserve it!
Your weekly emails always contain amazing snip its of information, opportunities to learn new things, allowing myself to feel like we’re not alone. You are such a beam of light, thank you for what you do! ❤️✨
“ But if self-punishment led to healing, we’d all be healed by now”
[Leads standing ovation] 👏👏👏
Thanks for another wonderful post. I’m glad you’re feeling better, Megan, and sharing your light with all of us!
Thank you AJ!! Appreciate the clapping hands and your presence here in general! 🥰💜
I *definitely* needed to hear this, and I am sharing this with friends and colleagues who are also struggling. Joy is so important to give AND receive, and we need to give it to ourselves as well…even if we (incorrectly) think we don’t deserve it. Thank you for your uplifting messages 💜
Thank you Victoria!! Very much appreciate you reading and sharing 🥰💜