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Gennarose's avatar

I am sending you so much love and light and peace. I’ll spare you detail but I went through something very similar recently after I moved back to the county I was in an abusive relationship in 16 years ago.

Please know this does NOT invalidate all of the incredibly hard work you have already had to do to move forward. You opened your heart again. You SHARED your experience which has helped people like me feel less alone. You just weren’t quite done processing, because there isn’t any timeline for trauma healing.

You are amazing. You are exactly where you are supposed to be. Much love.

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Megan Jayne Crabbe's avatar

There isn't any timeline - you are absolutely right 🥲 thank you 💜

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Kira's avatar

I've been in this situation and there is no right answer 💜 I hope your able to be held and supported by all those who love you including us 🫂 protect your peace and please know you don't owe anyone anything. You are so very loved and I am glad you are safe 💕

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Megan Jayne Crabbe's avatar

🥲 thank you Kira, I so wish there was a right answer, but I guess we just do what feels most right when we feel like we can 💖

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Kira's avatar

Absolutely, please take care and know you are highly favored, loved and beautiful Soul 💜

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Remi's avatar

Hi there,Megan. We can surprise ourselves when something or someone re emerges from our past. What I discovered, like you, I’m not the same person as I was then. And what I’m feeling is take it slow, be mindful of every single thing I do (including washing up, tidying up, lying down , resting - everything) and what I found is I settle into a gentle equilibrium and my slow pace allows me to know what I want to do about this new news❤️ I’m sure something similar will happen to you.🙂👍🏽

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Megan Jayne Crabbe's avatar

This is spot on Remi! It's really forced me to pause and go slow, just do the basics until I arrive back at myself 💖

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Denise Armer's avatar

I’m so sorry you went through this you owe sharing your experiences to know one but who you choose. I went through an emotional abusive relationship a very long time ago . Take care of yourself you deserve to be happy I’m glad you have support from people who care x

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Megan Jayne Crabbe's avatar

Thank you Denise, sending hugs! 💖

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Stella's avatar

Ooof this hit close to home. I've been in a very similar situation to this, but the other side from you. I spoke up about an abusive piece of s*** in the autistic community who was in a position of power (who I can't name because he called the police on ME accusing me of harassment for telling the truth - ???? anyway). I knew his ex who had also experienced abuse from him and spoke to them about it a lot around that time. I know they found it really difficult because it made a lot of what happened to them suddenly feel more real once the world knew about it, and super conflicted about whether to talk about it because they were scared for their safety. I'm sending you so much love and also - know that the person who spoke up likely doesn't expect you to say anything at all if you don't want to. I spoke up knowing I was doing it for people who didn't feel able to ❤️

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Megan Jayne Crabbe's avatar

Sounds like you did an incredibly brave thing and I'm sorry it lead to more bullshit for you 😩 thank you for sharing this perspective 💖 I hope you have some peace from it now 💖

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Stella's avatar

Thank you - it was incredibly stressful at the time but thanks to some very supportive women and people in the community, we pulled through together ❤️ I hope things get better for you too. Time and therapy are the great healers

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Tawnja's avatar

I am sorry to hear this. It took me almost 10 years to be able to talk with others about my trauma. Granted I have not had anyone he has been with share with me. But now I am able to be there for others and tell them my experiences and make them feel seen and heard. I have a friend trying to get away from an abusive ex right now. I am there for her and listen. But try not to dwell in it. Because like you I was broken but I am not anymore. I worked hard to be where I am at today. Just wanted to say I see you and I hear you and am sending you positive vibes. Stay strong!

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Megan Jayne Crabbe's avatar

Tawnja you should be so so proud of all the work you've done to get here 💖 what a powerful example you've made 🤗

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Kelly's avatar

thank you for sharing what you did not need to on our behalf but perhaps your own. and in a way that helps others (me). i am sorry you are reliving and having to go through this. but maybe also you have been given an opportunity to heal some of those wounds as a you who can navigate them better than the you who had just received them. sending you a hug and the knowledge you can go easy on yourself!

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Victoria Stuart's avatar

So sorry to hear you also went through something horrific by him. Sending you hugs for the emotional rollercoaster you have been on this week. Thoughts are with you and his most recent girlfriend. No one should have to endure abuse. 💗

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Jude's avatar

Hi lovely 💕 I am so sorry you went through this. It is truly brave to own in public the bad stuff that has happened to you in private. I want to say that you are strong and perfect and I support you. I know you have real-life, close to you people who will hold space and hold you, reflecting your beauty and strength back to you. I am so glad for them. Take such good care of yourself right now 💕💕

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Megan Jayne Crabbe's avatar

Jude this is the loveliest, warmest message - like a hug 🤗 thank you so so much, I appreciate you! 💖💖

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Emma's avatar

I’m glad you have lots of loving people surrounding you and that you are able to be loving to yourself at this time. Thank you for sharing how this has shaken you and how you are navigating what you need - I have survived a violent and controlling relationship and it has been difficult at times to know how to acknowledge my experience and heal while holding compassion for my ex-partner. (If you haven’t read it, “In the Dream House” by Carmen Maria Machado is a brilliant book on recovering from abuse as a queer person.) Sending love and echoing what others have said - your story is yours and you get to decide when and how (or if) to share it in a way that honours your values while looking after your wellbeing ❤️‍🩹

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Megan Jayne Crabbe's avatar

Thank you for the rec and for the kind words Emma! I appreciate this 💖

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Nat Nat's avatar

Go you for continuing to take care of yourself during such a tumultuous time!!!

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Vicky B's avatar

Big love babes and just be gentle with yourself 💖💖💖✨✨

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Patricia's avatar

Just got back home from something, too. And still on the journey with other things. Sending you so much love. 💙

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HMussard's avatar

Thank you for sharing your vulnerability. Sending sooooo much love.

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Nienke's avatar

I love how you recognize how much work you’ve done to heal. Also, I hate that you had to heal because of what he did to you. 💛

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Maddy C's avatar

Ohhhh my gosh. Thank you so much for sharing this. I'm so glad you have gentle spaces to process it, and I'm so grateful I got to read it. It's so real and so resonant.

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Maddy C's avatar

(but, tbc, no part of me thinks you're obligated talk publicly about anything you don't/don't yet want to! It's a precious privilege to have anyone share anything with you, especially something so tender.)

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