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Hannah Gardiner's avatar

Jesus Christ. I’m sat in a bar in the middle of Murcia spain on my own reading this and trying to contain my watery eyes. I ended a relationship 2 months ago, it was only a year a half, and I loved him so so much. It was a love that I had never felt and I got completely Blind sighted. But I was already Hannah 2.0 and I had learned that love wasn’t enough. My boundaries weren’t being respected. His words and actions didn’t align. Often I didn’t feel loved in the way I wanted because he couldn’t make space to love me how I need. And Hannah 2.0 chose herself and it was fucking the hardest thing I’ve ever done. Sometimes I wish I didn’t do it. But then I know that there’s this Hannah 3.0 that I cannot understand or imagine yet but I feel her and she’s the only thing that’s getting me through this horrendous heartbreak. And reading this literally reaffirmed everything. Thank you so much❤️

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Megan Jayne Crabbe's avatar

Hannah 2.5 - I see you, I feel you, I'm cheering for you. Thank you for sharing this and for choosing yourself - that was the bravest thing and my heart recognises your heart 💜💜

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Hannah Gardiner's avatar

Thank you Megan ❤️ I love what you're doing here, it's amazing.

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Dinah's avatar

Well done, incredible Hannah, for choosing yourself… all the future Hannah’s will thank you for that

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Hannah Gardiner's avatar

Thank you dinah ❤️❤️that's lush of you to say!

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Meg's avatar

I remember that feeling. It’s fucking awful. But, I am so proud of myself and who I have become post-breakup, that I will always maintain that my breakup was simultaneously the best and worst thing to ever happen to me.

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Megan Jayne Crabbe's avatar

Yes Meg! These two things can exist at the same time. Thank you for the reminder 💜

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Earthfairysteph's avatar

Omg this resonates with me so much. so 6years ago I split from my ex and moved 150miles back home and got a new job but as I was finding myself I rediscovered activities I used to enjoy and started to socialise again I used the time to find myself go on girls holidays take myself on dates and travel solo. All this I feel I could never do with my ex, 6 years later I'm now ready to start dating (it would of been sooner but covid happened) thank you for writing such an amazing newsletter and being such an inspirational person

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Dinah's avatar

Congratulations for having taken the time to get to know yourself better 👏👏👏👏

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Betsy's avatar

Thank you so much for this piece, Megan. It touched on things I haven't been able to verbalize yet -- especially the idea of losing the layers we've grown around this other person and how raw it feels. As I navigate this first heartbreak and approach my 30th birthday, I'm figuring out who this version of Betsy really is. Because I have to believe this pain ultimately reaps some kind of soul-deep reward. So thank you for writing this piece and sharing it with us all. I feel seen and understood and that means so much right now. Sending you love on this journey of healing and self-discovery. <3

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Megan Jayne Crabbe's avatar

100% rooting for you Betsy - the soul-deep stuff will start to show up one day soon 💜

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Sabrina's avatar

Thanks for this.. I took a screenshot of the last part because that’s where I started to cry so I guess I needed that part. I got divorced last year and just found out the new girlfriend (he already ‘knew’ when we were married) is pregnant now. So I’m hoping I won’t always be the version that got destroyed.. and am waiting for the version that can touch the handle of the door and stay whole 🖤

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Megan Jayne Crabbe's avatar

Sending you a massive wave of kindness right now Sabrina - it won't feel this way forever, promise 💜

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Dinah's avatar

Feel it all… and know that you are undestroyable

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Maren's avatar

Probably my favourite yet! Didn't realize how much I needed to hear those words, though so painful probably the best outlook to have. And as much as it feels right now that I am most and don't know who I am anymore, this is what I'm trying to look forward to! Thank you so much, for writing it down so clearly!

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Megan Jayne Crabbe's avatar

Maren you are strong af and I can't wait for you to meet all the future versions of yourself 💜💜

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Michele's avatar

"Telling ourselves we won’t survive something makes no sense; we don’t know who we’ll be when that time comes or what we’ll be capable of."

Every word of this is 100% true. And I see it now, several versions of myself later. My separation and divorce took it out of me then. (That was 15 years ago)

But when you're in the middle of it, nothing makes sense. But I have become smarter, stronger, and more empowered as the new Me has evolved. Among the many affirmations I have collected, "Every next level of your life will demand a different version of you."

And I am loving the person I have become. Thanks for this wonderful insight and guidance, Megan.

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Megan Jayne Crabbe's avatar

Michele I love when you share your insights - you are so wise and have such a loving perspective (where's your newsletter??). Thank you 💜💜

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Cassie's avatar

I cannot even begin to tell you how much I needed this. I can't fathom putting it into words - it would just feel like I was re-writing this post. Thank you.

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Sophie's avatar

I’m not going through a breakup, but I am going through some really tough things at the moment, and this really encouraged me. I love the idea that a new me is being built, and she’s going to be even more of a badass. I see glimmers of it already, and even though I would really like the pain to stop already, I know there’s going to be a time when I point back to this and say “that was the time. That was the time where I evolved again. That was the time I chose me again. That was one of the times that brought me here.” Thank you for reminding me of that.

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Dinah's avatar

Sending love and badass power, Sophie xxxxx

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Sophie's avatar

Thank you! I feel the good vibes <3

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Dinah's avatar

Spot bloody on. I love getting older, I get to know more and more of myself, I have a lot of the 5 year old, the 17 year old, the 30 year old in me still, I can see how this living lark isn’t linear, it can feel like I’m going round in circles, repeating the same old patterns… but I think rather than circles it’s more like being a bird, rising on a thermal

Welcome, Megan 3.0 💕💕💕💕💕

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Apr 30, 2022
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Megan Jayne Crabbe's avatar

That might be on the goals list 👀💜

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Dinah's avatar

Yes yes yes 🥅

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